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I Am VERY Single But Let Me Give You Online Dating Advice Part 1

I Am VERY Single But Let Me Give You Online Dating Advice Part 1

 Image from  The Toast

Image from The Toast

by Lauren

I think the title explains it all. Here is some unsolicited advice for you by a non expert.

- Just go out with them. If they seem semi-normal and  friendly  just do it. The worst thing that happens is you get a GREAT bad story to tell at parties. Or you get murdered.

-However, make the first date something you can easily escape from. Weirdos happen (or maybe you’re the weirdo, which is what my subconscious whispers to me every time).

 Actual GIF of me on unsuccesful date 

Actual GIF of me on unsuccesful date 

 

Generally I stick to grabbing a drink, because you could politely-ish CHUG that G&T, call an Lyft and be home putting on a hair mask within 20 minutes (I speak from MUCH experience here.). The only exception I’ve made to this is a concert, cuz free tickets are free tickets and you can always leave early or get lost in the crowd.

-Tell friends where you’re going and with who. It’s smart safety-wise but more importantly there isn’t anything more fun than a post date group text.

-Don’t keep talking about how weird this is. You’re meeting a random stranger with the intention of possibly boning, brunching, having a kid, splitting a bank account (JK, as a bitter child of divorce I will tell you NEVER DO THAT), etc.. It should feel a little awkward and you talking about that for long periods of time won't fix that. 

-SIDE NOTE:Don’t lie how you met. It’s stupid.  Online dating is acceptable. We live in the future.

-If you're not feeling it, just leave. At the end of the day they're a stranger and there's nothing wrong with having a quick beer, polite goodbye and leaving. 

-Do not ghost. Be honest. You both took time out of your busy schedules to meet, and they’re letting you know they would like to spend more time with you, OR they’re doing something really bad and need to be made aware, so you can go to sleep knowing you helped womankind.

Anymore online dating tips Thrillers? Or better yet bad date stories?!

 

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